Still here...

So somehow I ended up back on my blog tonight, remembering what a terrible job I've done of keeping up with it. Oops... I thought I was going to update this blog more than anything else, but I've actually ended up just sending update newsletters, which I OCD-edly put too much time into and never feel like writing on my blog. But here I am now... trying to be a good little blogging girl. :)

So as I decided I should write *something* to update this blog, I was wondering what I should write about, and I never quite came to a clear conclusion. I re-read the last post I wrote, and life is definitely different than it was then. God has been so faithful and patient with me as I've settled in here. Reading that blog, as well as some other reminders I've had over the past week, re-emphasized the importance to me of really *remembering* the things God brings us through. Today is the official 2-month mark of when I left home, and I already feel like I've forgotten what a tough time I had here at first. The whole experience was definitely easier than I expected overall, but it was still difficult, as I remembered as I read about my Tianjin experience I previously wrote about. I so easily forget... I forget God's goodness and faithfulness to bring us through each stage. In fact, today I've felt myself fighting falling into a sort of complacency here as life has gotten much more comfortable already. As I got ready for bed tonight, I found myself noting the need to be more constantly-focused on God, rather than myself. I live a rather selfish existence, constantly thinking about what will make me happier and more comfortable. Why? This life isn't about me at all... this China experience isn't about me... nothing is supposed to be all about me. So why do I make it that way? I need to surrender these selfish tendencies and trade them in for such a God-centered mindset that I am continually thinking about Him and how to bring Him glory. That, in turn, will give me a more others-centered mindset, as I bring Him glory through loving others. I feel really challenged here to share more boldly. I'm constantly surrounded by people that don't know Him, and I feel like I'm failing at doing my part in making Him known. I try to bring up conversation when I find a way to, but it definitely hasn't gone very deep. That's why I'm here... I mean, that's why we're anywhere... so it's a bit disheartening to think that I'm not succeeding at the reason I have for being here. So yeah, I guess I could use your prayers for that. I want to a be a bold light. People should be able to look at me, look at my life, and listen to my conversation... and instead of seeing just me, be able to see the God who's sent me here. So prayers, thoughts, advice, comments, or anything else about any of this is completely welcome. Hope you're all encouraged and abiding in Him. Abiding... that's what He put on my heart. I'm not abiding the way I should. It's easy to just live life, trying to please Him, but not actually *abiding* in Him. So now just to do something with what He's put on my heart... ;)