Promise of Adventures...

“Adventures are funny things. They always begin with the unexpected, but  always end with the promise of adventures yet to come.”

I want to apologize—first of all to my Lord, and secondly to anybody reading—for the way that I doubted, wavered, questioned, and despaired… I looked at the waves around me, instead of at Jesus standing in the waves with me. I looked at the armies instead of at my victorious Leader. I got caught up in the hopelessness of the battle from my blinded human viewpoint… I forgot the truth of the battle we are fighting and Who is fighting for us… Today I finished the last book of a trilogy I’ve been reading called The Door Within. One of the commanders speaks about this battle… and about his King Eliam (who represents Christ)…

“Now is our time!” Kaliam exclaimed. “Our armies are outnumbered by the enemy! Our odds are grim at best.”Kaliam’s eyes were ablaze, and he stared from knight to knight before he continued.

“But we do not put our faith in odds or in numbers—nor even in the prowess of our weapons. We put our faith in the might of King Eliam, who alone defeated death! We serve a King who gave everything for this kingdom—not sparing even his life! And now… it is our turn. Draw your weapons and do not hide them again until victory is assured. Nothing can be spared. When the sun rises between the Mountains of Glory, let there be glory given to the King. Glory and a free Alleble—whether we all live or not!”

The battle is not easy… in fact, the battles in these books show devastation and tragedy—with the enemy showing himself seemingly stronger for most of the trilogy. Battles are lost, evil is rampant, and hope oftentimes shows itself dim… And yet the warriors of King Eliam constantly remind each other that they are never alone… even when they are facing the most hopeless of battles or dire despair, they are never alone. And not only that, but also that the battle is worth fighting. Win or lose, live or die, they were ready to fight that battle. Their King had given His life for them; and they were ready to give their lives for their King. 

I am a warrior for my King. I don’t feel like a warrior. I don’t think I often act much like a warrior. But He has made me His… and I am never alone in this battle. I have felt so alone for so long now, but those feelings are a lie from the enemy. He wants me to feel alone. But feelings are not truth. And I… am never… alone…

So my Jesus again brings me back to His hope. I doubted His plans for me… doubted His goodness in those plans… But He is always good. And life is an adventure… He wants me to enjoy the ride, rather than questioning the Creator of the ride. I think I’ve been questioning much of the time since being back from China. I don’t know what I’m doing with my life. And I’m so tired of being back at that place of not knowing. And even when doors are starting to open, I’m questioning them—questioning the goodness of those doors and of the One who opens them. I read this devotional recently, and was reminded of it again this morning:

The Perfect Ending

“Then Jesus said, "Did I not tell you that if you believed, you would see the glory of God?"
John 11:40 (NIV)

Ever watch one of those feel good movies? You know the kind with the predictable ending where everything works out great!  The hero wins, the problem is solved and yes, the bad guys lose.   We knew it from the very beginning, but we still clung to the edge of our seat waiting for goodness to spill out everywhere.  Wonder if we view life that way?  After all, we are assured of an amazing ending – God triumphs over evil and everything works out beyond our imagination.    We’ve read Revelation and even though we don’t understand all of it – we do know we have an incredible future.  But it’s that space of time between now and then that often derails us.  Instead of trusting and resting in our Mighty God, we find ourselves locked into today and minimizing His power.  Hope fades when justice is blown out the window, and we forget God lifted Joseph out of prison to save a nation.  Joy evaporates when people don’t measure up to our expectations, so we forget that Christ built His church upon Peter, the one who denied His very existence.  Faith is challenged in the midst of overwhelming problems, and we forget at the sound of His voice the storm ceased.  Evil appears to deal us a bad hand, and we forget the grave could not hold Him.  Despite our doubts, God divinely intervenes in our lives longing to exceed our predictability and surprise us with the miraculous.  For those who choose to look beyond today and believe the rest of the story, they will find that our God is faithful and true. 

“Father, Your goodness spills all around us – You are our Hope, and our future is secured in your promises.” 

That devotional speaks to my heart as I have been derailed lately… locked into today… minimizing my God’s power.

He wants me to remember… that “despite our doubts, God divinely intervenes in our lives longing to exceed our predictability and surprise us with the miraculous. For those who choose to look beyond today and believe the rest of the story, they will find that our God is faithful and true.”

So yesterday, I was quite fearful about the next adventure God has for me. There is a job possibility that I have been fighting in my heart, not wanting it to come about. But I am reminded today that God’s adventures are the best ones. I cannot see what He has in store. Whether or not this job is the next adventure, He wants to exceed my predictability… He wants to surprise me with the miraculous. There are also others aspects of life I have been questioning, and He simply keeps telling me over and over again, “Katherine, just abide in Me…” I need not question the King.

Life since China has been strange, and I’ve felt a bit like a floundering fish. I question why 4 ½ months after coming back, I’m still feeling so directionless. But I’m excited… because…

“Adventures are funny things. They always begin with the unexpected, but  always end with the promise of adventures yet to come.”

And one last devotional I just received this morning: 

Assurance

Jesus assures you that as you follow Him–
you will never meet a fear He cannot conquer;
you will never face an enemy He cannot defeat;
you will never enter a battle He cannot win;
you will never have a need He cannot meet;
you will never face a temptation He cannot overcome;
you will never have a burden He cannot lift;
you will never face a problem He cannot solve;
you will never have a bondage He cannot break;
you will never have a moment when He does not care;
you will never have a time when He is not there.

I have strength for all things in Christ Who empowers me [I am ready for anything and equal to anything through Him Who infuses inner strength into me; I am self-sufficient in Christ's sufficiency].  Philippians 4:13 AMP